Comments on: The Talk: Bringing Up Diabetes in a New Relationship

By: Talkin’ about the ‘Betes « Lemonade Life

Talkin’ about the ‘Betes « Lemonade Life — Fri, 02 Apr 2010 19:58:47 +0000

[...] about the ‘Betes January 22, 2009 by Allison Blass I’m the guest blogger over at Diabetes Mine today, chatting about relationships and diabetes education and all the awkwardness that comes with [...]

By: Vita

Vita — Sun, 28 Mar 2010 14:13:12 +0000

I am in a new relationship with a wonderful guy that has Type I Diabetes which he told me about a week after we met and now we’ve only been knowing eachother for a month. I am certainly concerned about it and have been reading all that I can on the internet and I plan to buy a couple of books today actually to include a cookbook. As soon as he told me of course I was concerned and as he opens up and shares with me the complications he is having I am even more deeply concerned but I am glad that he is comfortable enough with me to discuss it. I can’t lie it makes me nervous a bit after reading about the possibility of him becoming blind etc…, but I think that with my support and his openess we can make a go of it. He does seem to be a little down about it, I don’t know how to make it better other than to be supportive at this point but I’m in it now and I’m going to stay as long as he will let me.

By: Mille

Mille — Tue, 09 Feb 2010 13:06:52 +0000

This is such an interesting topic,i just started seeing someone who has type 1 diabeties. He brought it up to me on our first official date and was very casual about how he said it. He just took out his kit and tested, then said “i don’t know if i told you this, but i have diabeties”. He explained to me what he was doing and what happens with each result and that was that… although i wish i knew how to approach him about it and let him know i am here for him….ive basically been researching on my own so i wont have to make him feel uncomfortable by asking all kinds of questions…any suggestions?

By: Vicki

Vicki — Thu, 08 Oct 2009 17:46:28 +0000

I am new to a relationship with a man that has Type I diabetes. He is not controlled and doesn’t seem to think that life gets any better than what he is now—-tired, hypo, hyper, nauseated, weak….he does go for his 3 month checkups and I want to help him in every way but he gets VERY upset when I discuss his diabetes….can someone help me with suggestions. I am researching and educating myself every day and have even made an appointment with a diabetic educator. I know I am doing the right thing but how do you approach someone that is so sensitive to the fact and has not had the support to realize that he can live so much better than he is with diabetes?

Thank you for any information or tips!

By: QMS

QMS — Wed, 04 Feb 2009 14:27:34 +0000

My sister is a diabetic person but it doesn’t affect her relationship with boyfriend, peers and of course to us her family..

By: » The Talk, Part 2: Community Thoughts on Relationships - DiabetesMine: the all things diabetes blog

Thu, 29 Jan 2009 13:01:09 +0000

[...] The Talk: Bringing Up Diabetes in a New Relationship [...]

By: Jamie

Jamie — Tue, 27 Jan 2009 06:01:04 +0000

In my only relationship that has mattered, my current one with my husband, my diabetes has always been something known about. I tend to be very talkative about my having the disease , but definitely had to educate my hubby about it. The first real conversation came the first night I slept over, as I brought a glucagon shot and sugar paste over as a just-in-case. I had to explain to my hubby what each was and how to use them. While they have never been used by him in the 6 years we’ve been together, for me my disease and it’s entrapments have always been at the forefront.
I am a brand-new reader to your blog – are you comfortable talking with everyone (obviously, to fellow diabetics ) about the disease? While the last time I was ridiculed and rejected because of the disease was in 5th grade (ew, she has rabies!), I’ve found the easiest way for me and the comfort of those around me is to be open and willing to discuss.

Good luck and best of wishes! Relationships involving diabetes can be done

By: Laura G.

Laura G. — Mon, 26 Jan 2009 17:49:31 +0000

For me there are layers of truth. I do let the Type 1 diabetes fact be seen right away with the meter and the pump, but I also let people believe that I’ve got it all under control. Then, very slowly, if they’re observant and if I trust them, they begin to learn that “well controlled diabetes” is more complicated than they thought. Some close friends and lovers still believe that I’m really healthy and that it’s no big deal. Others see how much work it really is, and trust me with their own health struggles in return. And my wise and unobtrusively supportive partner of seven years has begun to ask almost each morning when we wake up, not “How are you” (generally, “fine”) but “What are you” (116! 47! 291!) and, unlike anyone else I’ve ever known, actually knows what those numbers mean. I’ve come a long way in trusting her with the whole truth of diabetes.

I hope you’ve found someone who can really get it. Best wishes to you two!

By: Jim

Jim — Sun, 25 Jan 2009 05:47:50 +0000

I always tell the person I’m a T2 in the first meeting. No point in hiding it past that – if they’re not going to accept you because of diabetes better to find out early before you waste a lot of time….

By: Jen

Jen — Fri, 23 Jan 2009 21:26:27 +0000

I’m the partner of a T-1, and it came up on our first ‘official’ date, which was dinner. He pulled out his kit, explained that he has diabetes and tested. From that point on, it was simply a part of him–nothing to be hidden. It also never occurred to me to be ‘weirded’ out by it or anything, and I’m baffled by the stories I’ve read on blogs about dates who were uncomfortable with it.

I’m intellectually curious anyway, so I started reading blogs (I actually think I came to Amy’s site the next day, as I do work with blogs and was familiar with her site). I’ve been with him for over a year now, love him madly, and highs/lows/carb counting are just part of our routine. He has the book 50 secrets of the longest living people with diabetes, which I read, it helped me to understand quite a bit. It also made me aware of how I could be a better partner (be supportive, not smothering, etc.)

Good luck Allison! He’s a lucky guy.